MOVED TO WORDPRESS!!!!

I'm not sure if this will work or not....hopefully you all will get this.

If you do, big news! Well, not really, but humor me. I've moved the blog to WordPress. Same address, except instead of .blogspot.com, it's .wordpress.com.

So, without further ado, please visit the new Semper Gumby Adventures!

Sitter in a Pinch

This week have had the most miserable stomach bug thing. It reminds me a lot of when I got norovirus at UVA, in fact, I think that's what it may be because it's so similar. Caroline had it last weekend, then Greg, and while I've felt a little weird all week it finally hit me in full force today.

Because of this, I've pretty much been out of commission today. It's consisted of sitting on the couch and mildly playing with Caroline in between her naps. Since our sitter is out of town (and I'm in the process for looking for a couple of backup sitters), it's just us. Enter Sesame Street.

I generally have a rule for myself (especially when I'm home alone) to not watching TV during daylight hours. Kind of a strange rule, but I find it makes me feel less pathetic. I've therefore been keeping the same rule for Caroline, but today, Sesame Street seemed to be the perfect alternative to her bouncing on my stomach or crawling on top of me. And she seemed to like it too....

Thank you, Jim Henson, for helping me out in a pinch!

Cracking herself up

If you haven't figured it out already, Caroline is your typical attention-loving people person. She loves watching other babies and kids, and her favorite person to watch is herself (in the mirror).

Last night Greg showed her the video I posted last week (not the one of her waking up, but the one of  her laughing and standing next to the couch), and she of course thought it was so entertaining. It's neat to see how she can understand that she's watching another baby through the window of a tiny phone (even if she may not get that she's watching herself on video)....

Sarah Smiley - Great Column

Sarah Smiley is a military wife who is a fantastic writer. She has, as she writes, been a military dependent for her entire life (daughter of and wife to Navy pilots). In fact, the only time she has not had a military ID in her wallet were the six weeks between her college graduation (when children are no longer technically dependents) and her wedding.

I stumbled across this column today in a newsletter I receive and love it! She is just so honest, and perfectly describes the lifestyle. Even though there are so many variations in military life (she never moved growing up, for example, and her husband has only been on 2 deployments in their 10+ years of marriage....two very different experiences than most military brats/Marine wives I know), there are so many commonalities. On top of what all spouses do share (and what they often hide from others for fear of being misunderstood), I like Sarah Smiley because she married a Navy grad (like me), and was born during her Dad's deployment (like C) so I feel even more connected to her.

I'll stop rambling. Hope you like Sarah S!

Sarah Smiley | July 12, 2010

 

 

 

 

I have a love-hate relationship with the military. After 34 years as a dependent (I was born while my dad was on a seven-month deployment), this seems reasonable to me. Not everyone agrees. Military wives (forget the politically correct "spouse"; I'm a wife) should be selfless, upbeat and totally devoted to their husband's career. Wearing flag-motif socks and earrings is extra credit. It's the old "atta-girl" mentality. Complaining about military life is as socially unacceptable (perhaps even more so) than openly declaring that you didn't vote for Obama.

But,the truth is that more often than not, being a military wife involves hard work and sacrifice, and very few rewards (the tangible, selfish kind). Worst of all, being a modern-day woman and married to a military man is becoming increasingly difficult. 

Gone are the days when a military wife's job was to throw fantastic parties and make her husband look good. In its place is the expectation that a military wife throw fantastic parties, make her husband look good, and have a career, raise children (possibly home school them), further her own education, be well informed, and never (not ever) complain. We are 21st-Century women trapped within the confines of a 1950s mentality. When your husband moves, you move with him. When your husband has goals, you support them. When you have goals of your own, you shut up and smile. 

And yet, most military wives tell you that they love the military and its lifestyle. They aren't lying. Enter the love-hate relationship. In 2005, New York Times magazine ran a feature about me titled, "Confessions of a Military Wife." In it, the reporter nailed my complex feelings about the military when she wrote this:

"Somewhere between [Smiley's] enforced military cheer and the recurring urge to smash it, Smiley retains a child's wish, as strong and steady as a heartbeat that the military, in which she grew up, knows best. She wrestles with her fervent hopes that it will protect her and her family, even as she suspects it may not. Although she is not in the military, she is of it; it represents her entire life's experience, and she defends it as fiercely as she doubts it."

I have given many years to the military. I've moved for it, planned a wedding around it, put my career on hold for it, and even planned childbirth around it. My entire life -- from where I shop to which doctor I see to the zip code on my mailing address -- has been coordinated by the military. 

However, last year I started on a path all my own. I went back to school to pursue my master's degree and doctorate. It was a dangerous decision. "What if Dustin is transferred?" people asked. "Will you quit school to move with him?" This was always said with a subtle, incredulous tone that read between the lines, "Of course you'll move with him because you're a good military wife." 

I ignored the question as doggedly as I avoided any conversation with Dustin that included the words "transfer," "move," or "our next assignment." My eyes were on my own prize and I couldn't be sidetracked by my husband's commitment to the military. If that sounds selfish, consider that for 11 years, my husband pursued his dream without being distracted by mine. 

For more than a decade, I submitted to the military and its plans for us without thinking because there was no other choice. Dustin was committed for a predetermined number of years to payback the government for his education at the U.S. Naval Academy and, later, flight school in Pensacola, Fla. That commitment has come to an end. There's nothing holding Dustin to the military now except for his own personal commitment to our country. (Being within six years of retirement doesn't hurt either.) 

Next year, Dustin's tour in Bangor, Maine, will come to an end. Uncle Sam will move him to a new assignment in a different city and state, and I've chosen to stay behind until he gets out or retires and joins us in Maine again.

This is unthinkable to many civilians, and indeed, a good amount of military wives, too, all of whom will believe I'm putting Dustin in an impossible situation, that I am, in some way, doing something to him. Yet, I haven't asked Dustin to get out of the military. Nor have I asked him to give up on his personal commitment. In fact, I require nothing of him at all. I can't ask Dustin to abandon his plans any more than he should ask me to forfeit mine. Still, as far as I know, no one has said to him, "A good husband would stay behind with his wife."

Waking Up

Well, there are about 7 of you who actually read/enjoy this (and let me know that, thank you). Although it's somewhat depressing that there aren't more, I think I can handle not being the most popular blog on the internet. After all, blog writing helps me avoid making a million 1-hour phone calls each week to catch up with each and every one of my East Coast family members and friends.


Anyway, I'm still just tickled by the video recorder on my iPhone. Caroline seemed to be in an REM cycle this morning when I walked in, because she was flinching and smiling. It was adorable. Then she woke up and was drowsy and a bit disoriented - I do the same. Thought you'd enjoy!

Update

I know, I know....haven't written in a while. The truth is, I'm kind of losing steam for this blog. I think I might take a blog vacation, or maybe just write as the spirit moves me. I'm not even really sure who reads this blog, so it's silly to feel like I'm posting pictures/stories/thoughts to a ghost audience. I know that's part of the package with blogs, but I'm not feeling it now, so I might not be posting as often as I have been. Or maybe I'll feel rejuvenated in a few weeks. Who knows!

That being said....I thought I'd share this sweet video yesterday from my new (and awesome, I don't care what they say about reception issues because I haven't experienced any at all) iPhone 4. Caroline is over 9 months old now, is "cruising", eating real food, and is her usual bubbly self. Her favorite thing to do now is to hang out around the couch, which is where Greg and I spend most of our time when we're at home. Hope you like it!